This blog entry is for all the mamas out there who feel like they’re failing at every turn.

I woke up this morning around eight. I’ve been trying to “sleep in” once or twice a week because, well, menopause. Most mornings, we gather in the living room, around our laptops, and work for an hour or so before breakfast. This morning started out like all the others. Nanny popped up (she’s doing better after her pulmonologist appointment yesterday…more on that shortly) and announced that she needed to go to the bank and post office. I told her I would drive so she didn’t have to fool with parking, getting in and out, etc.

Here we go, driving down the highway, when it hit me like a TON OF BRICKS. I forgot to make JP dinner last night! Your first thought is probably, “well, Andrea, he is eighteen years old.” While that is very true, he’s also not your typical eighteen year old. I mean, he knows how to do (and does do) a lot of stuff around the house. He pretty much takes care of himself. But there are a few things that make him uncomfortable. Messing with the stove/oven is one of them. He WILL do it, but if I’m here, he’d rather not. Honestly, if I’m home, I’d rather him not! He came to my room, knocked on the… curtain (again, another story), and asked, “mom, would you mind making me some Ramen Noodles?”
“Of course,” I answered. I meant it at the time, but never gave it another thought. Until this morning, on the way to the post office. Now I’m sitting here, seven thousand hours later, feeling like crap.

Really, what child has to ask their parent to make food? Don’t most families automatically provide meals? Nope, not us. JP has no idea when, or if, he’ll ever find his mother in the kitchen. In my defense, he also doesn’t eat like a typical person. Even if I did cook, the chances of him eating what I make are slim to no-way-in-hell. Whatever. I’m heading to his room now to apologize.

All of that to say, MAMA… you’re doing an amazing job! At the very least, I’m sure you’re feeding your children. Give yourself grace and take care of yourself.

Because I know you’re wondering…

Yes, I have a curtain for a door to my room. Why? Beats the heck outta me. We certainly have the means to purchase a door. We certainly have the ability and skill to hang a door. Apparently, what we don’t have, is the will and desire to follow through with ANYTHING on the domestic front (hence the whole reason for this post). The Martha Stuarts and Joanna Gaines of the world would spit in our faces. Go ahead and dial up DSS, because we’re horrible and have no business being in charge of homes and families.

Quick Update On Nanny

Yesterday, she saw her pulmonologist for the first time since leaving the hospital. The appointment could not have gone any better! He listened to her lungs and administered a walking test (for the oxygen). She knocked both out of the park. She goes back in one month for a repeat CT scan and gets to keep her oxygen, to use on an as-needed basis, for three more months. I could immediately tell that Nanny’s anxiety had lifted. Mine too. Yesterday was a good day.

We are looking forward to that salt air and sea breeze therapy this weekend!